The Happiness Equation: Exploring the Keys to Well-Being
This thing we all seek, happiness, is elusive.
The first question for us is: “How do you define happiness?”
The second question is: When rating yourself on a 7-point scale, do you rate yourself as a very happy person (7) or a not very happy person (1), or somewhere in-between?
The third question is: When rating yourself on a 7-point scale, compared to most of your peers, would you consider yourself more happy (7) or less happy (1)?
Build the Life You Want, co-written by Arthur Brooks and Oprah Winfrey, has the subtitle of The Art and Science of Getting Happier. If you are like many people, we need to start by realizing that happiness is not just a feeling. It is a deeper state of well-being. Arthur has come up with the following equation to describe happiness:
ENJOYMENT + SATISFACTION + MEANING = HAPPINESS
Let's take a look at each of these individually, starting with enjoyment.
ENJOYMENT
You may be tempted to link enjoyment with pleasure. Pleasure is a part of enjoyment. Pleasure starts in the limbic system of our brain and only really becomes enjoyment when we add two things: other people and memories.
This moves pleasure from the limbic system of the brain to the executive center of the brain, your prefrontal cortex (PFC). The limbic system in the brain has no language associated with it. The PFC is where we get our identity and where we actually cognitively think through things. It is only when pleasure is combined with other people in such a way as to make a memory, that we have deep enjoyment.
SATISFACTION
Satisfaction is a little more complicated. Think back to something that you are proud of. What's the first thought that comes to your mind? Often it has something to do with you overcoming a challenge. Also, think of a time when you were given something that you really wanted. How long did the satisfaction last after receiving it? The attainment of true satisfaction is unique to human beings. It comes from struggle combined with achievement. That's why when we are given things, the satisfaction does not last as long.
One way to increase satisfaction is to examine what it is really equivalent to. Satisfaction is not equivalent to what we have. The one with the most toys does not win. It is what we have divided by what we want. This ratio determines how satisfied we are. You can work on the numerator of this ratio, but that is a harder route to take. If you work on the denominator of this ratio, you start to limit your desires for more and instead become more and more satisfied with what you already have.
It is also important to realize that most satisfaction has a shelf life. If you give someone a raise, the satisfaction that comes from that experience typically does not last two weeks. Brooks quotes the common example of people moving to California because there’s more sun there, which should lead to prolonged satisfaction, right? The data would show that the satisfaction associated with moving to California lasts less than six months. We are not created for satisfaction to have a long shelf life. Once the thing that caused our satisfaction becomes the new normal, our satisfaction dissipates.
MEANING
The third area associated with happiness is meaning. Brooks defines meaning as having three components: coherence, purpose, and significance. Coherence is understanding why things happen. Purpose is having direction and goals in life. Significance is knowing why you are alive. Without meaning, happiness is fleeting.
It is important to realize that meaning often comes in hard times, especially in suffering. We so often want to avoid hard times in our lives. But it is in these times of deep introspection and examination, that we begin to understand the depth of what life really is about and what our purpose is. Both of these intentional activities lead to happiness.
Are some people just more predisposed to being happy? Brooks would argue that likely 50% of happiness is in our genes. So yes, some people are more predisposed to being happy. But the other two components are our circumstances and our habits. While the proportions between these is not universally agreed to, intuitively it makes sense that these things contribute to our happiness.
If we look more deeply at habits, which habits drive us to happiness? Brooks argues for four habits being the primary contributors to happiness. The first is faith, having a transcendent focus that is beyond your own existence. The second is family and having strong family bonds. The third area is friends. Not just friends that can do things for you, but friends that are not “deal” friends. Friends that you really have no utility for other than enjoyment from. The last area is work. Coming full circle, work needs to allow you to struggle and strive and earn your success. Work also has joy that comes from serving others.
So, how about you?
What do you need to improve in the areas of enjoyment or satisfaction or meaning?
Who is with you on the journey?
How are you helping others you lead improve their happiness in life and work?
Every trend begins with one next step! Happiness may not be so elusive after all!
Until next month…